


Downtime

by hypatia



Series: The Incredibly True Adventures of 2 Hackers in Love [12]
Category: James Bond (Craig movies)
Genre: 003 - Freeform, Cameo by Q's cats, Friendship, Gen, Mobility Aids, Q refers to Hardison but he doesn't appear in this story
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-25
Updated: 2020-07-25
Packaged: 2021-03-05 05:48:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 938
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25499338
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hypatia/pseuds/hypatia
Summary: Q and 003 drink beer, chat, and might eventually play video games.
Relationships: Alec Hardison/Q (James Bond)
Series: The Incredibly True Adventures of 2 Hackers in Love [12]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1568371
Comments: 10
Kudos: 54





	Downtime

“Curry and killing pixelated aliens tomorrow?” asked 003 as she dropped off what remained of her equipment early Wednesday morning.

“Can’t, it’s Thursday—Callahan’s,” said Q. “Friday?”

“Nope, got a date,” said 003.

“I see how this is, Grace. Ditching me for _romance_ ,” teased Q.

She smirked. “Nah, just sex.”

“Oh well, that’s all right then,” Q grinned.

“Tonight would work,” she offered.

Q thought for a moment. “Done. Come by around 1930?”

She nodded.

Grace arrived precisely on time at Q’s flat, carrying a takeaway bag.

“Looks like your cats have missed me,” she said as Q let her in and his cats crowded around her ankles.

“No accounting for taste,” he said dryly. “Or they think they want curry. Please do not give them curry.”

“You have plenty of beer?” she asked, dropping the takeout bag on the coffee table in front of the couch.

“Always,” he said, heading to his kitchen to fetch said beer. “You know what I do for a living.”

“Been on your feet for twenty hours straight again quartermaster?” she asked following him into the kitchen to fetch plates and utensils.

Q frowned at her. “Eighteen, why?”

“You’re limping. Fetch your bloody cane.”

“Not worth it, I’m going to be sitting down in two minutes.”

“And you’re going to drink a lot of beer with me, and then you’re going to regret not having your cane when you want to get up again. I will feed the fuzzy monsters curry if you don’t fetch your cane.”

“ _Fine_.” He put the beer bottles on the coffee table and limped to his bedroom, returning a moment later walking with the cane.

“Better?” she asked.

“Somewhat,” he admitted.

“How many beers do I have to get you to drink before you’ll tell me more about that?”

Q smirked. “Sorry, classified. Doesn’t matter how much more beer I consume.”

“Liar.”

“It’s pronounced ‘pedant’,” said Q, opening the bag and pulling out containers of rice and curry. They served themselves and ate in silence for a few minutes.

“How’s our newest 00 settling in from your perspective?” Grace asked.

“009 still feels that he has something to prove, so he overthinks and struggles when he’s uncertain how to proceed. But I think I’ve found the key to keeping him grounded.” He chuckled. “He’s also half-convinced I live in the tunnels under headquarters and never see the light of day.”

“And whose fault is that?” she asked, pointing at him with her beer bottle.

He shrugged. “Ariel thought it would be funny.”

She raised an eyebrow. “Since when is _that_ your decision criteria?”

Q smirked. “On and off since I was seventeen?”

“They bring out the worst in you,” sighed Grace.

“Not even close,” said Q with a laugh.

She suppressed a smirk.

“What?” asked Q.

“They also think we need to get you laid,” she said.

“What? When did they decide _that_?”

“The last time they saw you DJ,” she said. “They said the theme was angst and pining.”

“Oh. I see,” said Q, taking a swallow of beer. “They’re just behind on Callahan’s drama.”

“Callahan’s drama?”

“The regulars have their ongoing stories: hookups and breakups and some—fascinating—life choices. So do the staff. One of the bouncers and the house manager had been mutually pining for weeks. It was driving the rest of us batty. I put together a set just for them. Nearly everyone in the building figured it out before they did.”

“But they did figure it out?”

“Eventually.” He rolled his eyes. “After we’d closed up for the night, they both came up to yell at me about it. The fact that they both had the same complaint clued them in. I’m reasonably sure they went home together.”

“Have you facilitated many relationships on the basis of the parties’ mutual desire to yell at you?” she asked, grinning.

“That was _probably_ the first, but I would have to give it some thought,” he smirked.

She laughed. “So, we don’t need to get you laid?”

He raised an eyebrow. “If that were a priority, ‘Mike’ would have no issue any Thursday night I chose.”

“So not just looking to hookup then?”

“I haven’t had _nearly_ enough beer for this conversation,” he complained.

“You said there’s more in the fridge.”

He gestured _be my guest_ with his nearly empty bottle _._

She got up and came back with a beer for each of them. “So.”

“I would think it’s obvious,” he said, finishing the last of the beer in his hand.

She shrugged and shook her head.

He set his empty bottle down and picked up the one Grace had brought him. “Who I am and what I do make a relationship with me a security risk for everyone involved. Not willing to put someone through that. Certainly not without being able to explain.”

“Oh. That,” she said, sipping her beer.

“Yes,” he said flatly. “That.”

“No one in the organization that you’d fancy? Skip the secrets and mismatched security clearances?”

Q looked into the distance and took a swallow of beer. “None of them compare,” he said quietly.

“Ah,” said Grace, softly. “That one I’m familiar with.”

Q looked over at her. “She, he, or they?”

“She.”

Q nodded. “He. I’ve seen him once since I joined.”

She half-smiled, but it didn’t reach her eyes. “She moved on. Has a wife and kids. I can usually manage to be happy for her.”

“Tonight was not supposed to leave me despondent,” griped Q. “Can we get to the killing aliens bit of the evening?”

She took a swig of beer and nodded. “Yes. Let’s.”

**Author's Note:**

> This takes place not quite a year after the events of _Skyfall_ and about a year and a half before the _Contingency Plans_ story line in this series.
> 
> I named 003 for Grace Jones, who played my favorite "Bond Girl", Mayday, in _A View to a Kill_.


End file.
